A Cabin in the Woods, and Other Updates

Our house church is taking a retreat to a cabin in Eureka Springs, Arkansas on the weekend of October 19.

We began preparing for the retreat in earnest a few weeks ago. At the time, we noticed that there were forty days between when we started preparing for the retreat and the retreat itself. There will also be forty days between the retreat weekend and the start of Advent, December 2.

I’m not trying to sound like the author of Matthew or anything, but the timing of the retreat does strike me as significant, especially for the purposes of spiritual formation. Forty day incriminates are perfect for establishing rhythms, for reflection, and for intentionally trying new things. For example, I have started journaling again. By the time the retreat gets here, I will have been at it for forty days.

The six of us are each going into the retreat with a distinct goal in mind. For example, some of us hope to produce a strategic plan document for our life, some of us hope to gain clarity on that elusive question, “What do I really want in life?” And some of us are aiming for an even more elusive goal: relaxation.

We have complied a few tools to help us meet our various goals. These tools mainly focus on heightening our self awareness. They include:

•     our detailed Meyers-Briggs profile. (Get questionnaire here.)
•     a reading from the popular book, Strengths Finder
•     The Five Question Exercise
•     Community Values activity
•     Twenty Statement Test (TST) asking the question, Who Am I?
•     Personal inventory emails, from the book Practicing the Way of Jesus
•     The retreat itself!

Our house church meets on Wednesdays. Generally we cook and eat together, do common prayer together, and talk/discuss/hang out together. It has been fun working together to plan this retreat. I think we are all looking forward to it in one way or another.

It is wonderful to have such a great community of people, and such a great rhythm of community, as part of our lives.

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Modifying the Twelve Marks

Revisiting the Twelve Marks

The book Schools for Conversion: Twelve Marks of a New Monasticism is a collection of essays about new monastic intentional communities. This book had a foundational role in the development of my understanding of intentional communities. (If you are not familiar with the twelve marks, see appendix A at the end of this post.)

The book suffers somewhat from being written and edited by a committee. It reads like a mix between a textbook and a really cumbersome mission statement—the kind of statement you get when constituents try to incorporate every relevant noun and verb into their clauses.

But despite its sprawling scope and fractured style, the book is indispensable for anyone interested in new monasticism because of the ideas, experiences, and passions that the various authors communicate. It is an ambitious book. The authors were seeking to give some form to the new monastic social movement, and I would say they succeeded.  I found the book to be both interesting and inspiring, and I own a debt to the authors for the ideas and vocabulary they supplied.

– – –

Modifying the Twelve Marks

while all new monastic communities are intentional communities, not all intentional communities are new monastic. New monasticism is a fairly specific enterprise (as evidenced by the long list of “marks.”)

Having researched and been immersed in intentional community for a year or so now, I find that I identify with some of the marks more than others. While new monasticism resonates with me, I would not describe myself as a new monastic.

I have taken the liberty of revising the list of twelve marks. I have shortened it down to six. Of the twelve marks put forward by the book, these six resonate with me the most and reflect my take on intentional community.

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, they say. I get the feeling that the authors intended their work to be viewed as a starting point, not as a set-in-stone handbook or a sacred text. As such, I am gratefully using it as a springboard. Here is my shortened list.

– – –

The six most important marks of intentional community in my view:

(I define intentional community as a group of people who are gathered around a common goal, vision, or set of values, and that is characterized by the following marks.)

1. Nurturing common life among members of intentional community. (cf. mark #7)
   – shared rhythms such as meals
   – high degree of teamwork among members
   – egalitarianism
2. geographical proximity. (9)
3. Commitment to positive communication, conflict resolution, and peacemaking. (11)
   – self awareness
   – group decision making processes
4. Environmental consciousness and prioritization of the local economy. (10)
   – gardening
   – sustainability
   – farmers markets
   – product choices
5. Spiritual participation together. (6 & 12)
   – common prayer
   – sabbath
   – celebration
   – hospitality to the stranger
6. Sharing. (2)
   – often some form of common purse
   – sharing resources and/or expenses

– – –

The Marks I didn’t Keep

This exercise has helped me examine my own working definition of intentional community. [keyword: “working.” I am more interested in practice than theory here. I want to examine what we actually do.]

I do not disagree with any of the twelve marks per se. I excluded certain marks simply because they are not central to my particular vision of what intentional community is. For example, the mark relating to single people and married people (8) seems unnecessary. While a very important topic, I ultimately take it for granted that we don’t discriminate on the basis of marital status.

I do not currently share an interest in locating to “abandoned places of empire (1)” and, while hospitality (3) is very important, for me it falls under spiritual disciplines and therefore is not its own mark.

I did not include the marks that pertained specifically to monastic spirituality (such as the “disciplined contemplative life (12),” “way of Christ,” and “rule of life (6),” etc.) or specifically to the church (“racial division within the church (4),” “humble submission to the church (5),” etc.) because I am not a member of a monastic community or a church community, though I do find monasticism and the church to be sources of great inspiration.

I also find new monasticism, as well as Twelve Marks, to be an important source of inspiration as I continue to try to live out my adventure in togetherness.

– – –

Appendix A: Twelve Marks of a New Monasticism, Table of contents

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“A Place for Sabbath Feast”

Living the Sabbath: Discovering the Rhythms of Rest and Delight (Norman Wirzba, 2006) is the most down-to-earth book on sabbath I have found so far. It is part of the Christian Practice of Everyday Life series.

The book has two parts. The first, called Setting a Sabbath Context, contains such chapters as The Practice of Delight and The Decline of Delight. The second part is called The Sabbath in Practical Context and contains such chapters as Work and the Sabbath, Sabbath at Home, and Sabbath Environmentalism.

Below I have included a quote from the chapter Sabbath at Home. In it, the author builds a compelling case for community “focal practices,” which among other things is a great bit of terminology. Less confusing-sounding than charism, less committal that mission, less clunky than core value. The paragraph captures my own feelings on Sabbath perfectly.

A Place for Sabbath Feast:

“For Sabbath people, it will not be enough simply to resist cultural forms and expectations. We also need to develop positive practices that will draw us closer to each other. Albert Borgmann has wisely suggested that homes and communities recover what he calls “focal practices;” the set of personal and communal habits that bring people into regular and sympathetic face-to-face contact. In our time of hyperreality, when relationships are increasingly mediated by technological gadgets and automobiles, and when speed overwhelms our capacity for attention and patience,  a focal practice compels us to take stock of how we live from and through each other. These are practices like neighborhood Little League and a community orchestra, activities that bring us into closer contact with each other so that we can directly see how we need and benefit each other and thus really ought to make more time to celebrate and enjoy what we live together.”

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The FEC: Part 2

Acorn Community Farm

• Population: 24 adults
• Founded: 1993
• 72 acres in rural Virginia
• “A community of work and play, and distributing rare heirloom seed varieties.”

“We are interested in meeting people experienced in community-building, communication and facilitation, and interested in building a dynamic, supportive social culture.”

Twin Oaks

• Population: 90 adults, 13 children
• Founded: 1967
• 400 acres in rural Virginia
• A long-term, stable community based on rich culture and diverse economy.

Twin Oaks is the oldest and largest of the Federation communities. It was originally founded by a group inspired by B. F. Skinner’s fictional book Walden Two.

East Wind Community

• Population: 65 adults, 11 children
• Founded: 1973
• 1,045 acers in rural Missouri
• Doing things ourselves, individual freedom, stewarding our beautiful land.

What does East Wind Community do with 1,045 acres? They have a garden, a 1/8 acre herb garden, a 1.5 acre orchard, a 140 acre ranch, and 850 acres of oak and hickory forest.

Sandhill Farm

• Population: 7 adults, 1 child, 1 toddler
• Founded: 1974
• 135 acres in rural Missouri
• “Organic homestead & child-friendly family of friends with current openings for new members.”

Sandhill produces a big sorghum crop every year. “Not only is sorghum syrup our biggest agricultural income source, it’s also one of our main social events of the year.”

Skyhouse/Dancing Rabbit

• Population: 3 adults
• Founded: 1997
• 280 acres in rural Missouri
• “An income-sharing group within a larger ecovillage, dedicated to sustainability.”

The principal mission of Skyhouse is to support and nurture its membership… Another important Skyhouse goal is to support the development of Dancing Rabbit in whatever way possible.

Emma Goldman Finishing School

• Population: 10 adults
• Founded: 1996
• Urban Seattle
• “A social justice commune in the heart of Seattle.”

“Our community is based on the principles of societal change, egalitarianism, non-violence, ecology, simplicity, and community living.”

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Intentional Community Book List (UPDATED)

We started this list one year ago, so it is time for an update. People have been sending in their recommendations for “must read” books about community. Your contribution is still needed!

• permaculture
• simple living
• social issues
• business and legal
• classics
• monastic
• new monasticism
• spiritual practices
• philosophy/ethics
• community how-to

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A Sabbath Resolve

Living in community is a good way to learn about oneself. The Formation House curriculum, the Strengths and Values Small Group we participated in, and the general rock tumbler/fish bowl nature of intentional community have all afforded me many opportunities for self-reflection.

This year I have identified something that I am excited to focus on in the future. This thing will inform the rhythms I will seek to create for myself.

Sabbath is just a pause. It is a time to reflect, gather, celebrate, and prepare for the meaningful work ahead. It does not have to be a whole day, and it does not even have to be called “sabbath.”

While the concept of sabbath is counterculture, I know from practicing Sabbath with Amber (we started out celebrating it quarterly and now we celebrate it once a month) that Sabbath observation is a life-giving practice for me and is relatively easy to implement.

* * * * *

Moreover, I think Sabbath would make a good charism for a community.

Whether you call it a charism, focus, mission, core value, purpose, emphasis, or just “thing we do,” every community needs one sooner or later. Like a tent pole, a charism helps to give definition and form to community without being too ridged. It informs the rhythms a community will seek to establish and lays the groundwork for long-term cohesion.

Often, a community’s charisms emerge from the talents, values, and desires of its members. In fact, individuals often have charisms just as communities do.

Here at Formation House, we have been holding meetings to discuss what the members want to focus on next year. Someone voiced the desire to simply have more opportunities to spend time together.

Ironically, while community life is about more than doing the grocery shopping and figuring out an equitable way to do housework, it has been precisely those things that have taken up the bulk of our community time and energy—at the expense of hanging out and/or doing any number of other things together.

In this context, it is clear that a community must be thoughtful about what it wants its charism to be.

* * * * *

Having Sabbath as a charism makes a lot of sense for a community. Celebration is a perfect focal point for people to gather around. It is also a minimalistic charism in that it leaves lots of room for other charisms to grow.

Sabbath could be any day of the week (it does not have to be Sunday) and it could be as frequently or as occasionally as desired. It could be a neighborhood badminton tournament in the backyard. It could be dinner and a movie. It could be a planned day with no chores/obligations. It could be baking a cake just to celebrate life.

Again, to me Sabbath is a time to reflect, gather, celebrate, and prepare for the meaningful work ahead. Reflecting, gathering, celebrating and preparing does not happen on its own. That is why I am excited to practice Sabbath in my personal life and to promote it to anyone who will listen.

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Consensus Decisions

We are getting ready to cover consensus based-decision making in our curriculum at Formation House.

I have noticed something about the topics we have been studying this year: most of them are completely counter-intuitive.

Consensus based decision-making is a good example of this. The prescribed way of forming consensus is through actively seeking dissent.

Weird, huh?

Matt Pritchard says of community decision-making: “While [consensus decision making] is great in principle, most people have little experience or training in consensus decision making, and it shows: bad behavior reigns supreme and meetings drone on forever as small decisions are discussed ad nauseam.”(Pritchard, 2010)

Consensus based decision-making can be contrasted with majority rule. The two methods of decision-making have similarities. However, in majority rule, the 51 percent (or the three quarters, or whatever the majority is defined as) simply makes the decision while everyone else is out of luck. It’s not necessarily that those in the minority are wrong, it’s just that they’re out of luck. By contract, consensus decision-making seeks not only the agreement of most participants but also the resolution of minority objections. Like majority rule, consensus decision-making has a whole body of ideas, procedures and vocabulary surrounding how it works.

This model differs from what we are used to. For example, most meetings we attend are governed by the Robert’s (hallowed) Rules of Order. Matt’s comment on this is insightful;

“Most governance in organizations is focused on protecting the organization from the people that are of it. Unfortunately, this means that unhealthy organizations are able to hobble along almost indefinitely. Voting enables us to operate without trust.” (Pritchard, 2010)

This is a fair critique. However, I do understand why an organization might want to protect itself from the people who are in it. When I was little, my church went through a split due to a big conflict at the center of which was a pastor. When the dust finally settled, the church promptly revised its bylaws to prevent that kind of thing from ever happening again. It was something analogous to a prenup agreement.

* * *

Voting is easy. Voting is tidy. Those two statements are clues that voting is not the way to govern an intentional community. Things in community are messy. Intentional communities are characterized by high degrees of teamwork among members and by common visions, but not by groupthink or lockstep. Intentional communities are communities of individuals.

I particularly like the idea of being sensitive to dissent, because, frankly, I’m frequently the one who finds himself dissenting, but I’m not always the first one to speak up. And I imagine most of us have had experiences where our opinions were steam-rolled even when we did voice them, whether because the proposition/objection was not shared by others, or it was unconventional and thus rejected out of hand, or simply because people were in too big a hurry to listen.

I am looking forward to learning about this method of decision-making, and talking it over with the community in detail.

Interested in how the rubber meets the road when it comes to this model of decision making? Peruse the Wiki article. It’s our primary text. (Yeah, yeah. No book this time. We’re a community on a budget.)

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Jay’s List = 192 Things

As you may have seen in our previous post, we are tackling the 100 things challenge.

Our idea was to inventory first and then whittling down later.

Realization # 1: There are several different ways to count things.

According to one way of counting, I (Jay) currently have 83 things. But, that does not include my 48 articles of clothing. It also does not include the 61 things that Amber and I co-own together. Altogether I own 192 things. (83 + 48 + 61 = 192)

This does not include things we have in storage in Missouri, or things we are hold in common with Formation House this year, such as kitchen stuff and living room furniture.

There is probably room for more thoroughness in the way I have listed things below. Who is to say whether I should count individual handkerchiefs? There are no established rules for this sort of thing.

My rule of thumb, which I am trying to apply as consistently as possible, is: If I think of them as individual things (like my frisbees) I count them individually. If I think of  them as a unit (like my hammer and nails and screwdriver) then I count them all as one.

The real question is: is this just a mindfulness exercise for me, where I learn to appreciate the well-edited life, and the total number of items isn’t what is important? Or is this an exercise in being a spartan, a mendicant, whittling the list down strictly to 100 things? This remains to be seen. But I expect the answer for me will be somewhere in the middle. If I were to choose the latter, I would need a strong, specific rationale.

Realization # 2: I can stand to get rid of some stuff. For example, there are razors in my shaving kit that I’ve had for two years and have never used. I also have clothes that I never wear. What am I doing owning 16 t shirts??

So, I still have some editing to do. But for now, here is the working list:

– – – – – –

Toiletries

1.       Toothpaste

2.       Toothbrush

3.       Hair brush

4.       Electric trimmer

5.       Mustache scissors

6.       Bar of soap/shampoo

7.       Bath robe

8.       Pj pants

9.       Warm pj pants

10.   Towel

11.   Wash rag

12.   Fingernail clippers

13.   Hand cream

14.   Shaving bag

15.   Deodorant

16.   Toothbrush holder

Personal stuff

1.       Wedding ring

2.       Pocket knife and backup knife

3.       Wallet

4.       Keys/whistle/bottle opener

5.       Map of city/various bus schedules

6.       Handkerchief x 3

7.       eyeglasses

writing stuff

8.       Writing paper/notebook

9.       Pen

10.   Pencil

11.   Pen cup

12.   clipboard

13.   Journals

14.   Envelopes/stamps

15.   Letter box

Transportation

16.   Bicycle

17.   Helmet

Gadgets

18.   Cell phone/charger

19.   Wireless headphones

20.   Scientific Calculator

21.   Alarm clock / radio

22.   Battery powered alarmclock

23.   Voice recorder

shoes

24.   House slippers

25.   Waterproof shoes for winter

26.   Other shoes (Toms)

27.   Dress shoes (black and brown)

28.   Old pair of shoes

29.   Flip flops

Winter stuff

30.   Coat

31.   Hat/Scarf/Gloves

32.   Hoodie

33.   Fleece

34.   Umbrella

books

35.    KJV

36.    Anthology of texts of world religions

37.   Dictionary

Frisbees

38.   Ultimate disc (currently missing)

39.   Free style disc

40.   Golf disc putter

41.   Golf disc midrange

42.   Golf disc diver

43.   Other Frisbee

Misc.

44.   plastic tote

45.   Bottle cap collection

46.   Pillow

47.   Plastic drawers for socks

48.   Tool box

49.   Maglite

50.   Shot glasses x 2

51.   Hammock

52.   Luggage

53.   Memorabilia: rings, college pennant, yoyo, etc.

54.   Ceramics tools

55.   Backpack

56.   Green stuffsac

57.   Canvas backpack

58.   Lunchbox

59.   Mug

60.   No spill insulated mug

camping

61.   Tarp

62.   Rope

63.   Thermos

64.   Camp saw/hatchet

65.   Long underwear

66.   Compass

67.   First aid kit

68.   Stuff sac

69.   Twine

70.   Camp salt and pepper

71.   Call of the Wild

72.   Igloo water cooler

73.   Underarmor

74.   Small flashlight

75.   Carbineer

76.   Camping desk of cards

77.   Sunscreen

78.   Bug spray

79.   Cooking sterno

80.   Lighters

81.   Work gloves

82.   Camp Mirror

83.   Sweat pants

Clothes

84.   Black polo

85.   White polo

86.   Striped polo

87.   Many White t-shirts

88.   Sweatshirt

89.   Button down shirt short sleeve 1

90.   Button down shirt short sleeve 2

91.   Button down shirt short sleeve 3

92.   T shirt 1

93.   T shirt 2

94.   T shirt 3

95.   T shirt 4

96.   T shirt 5

97.   T shirt 6

98.   T shirt 7

99.   T shirt 8

100.            T shirt 9

101.            T shirt 10

102.            T shirt 11

103.            T shirt 12

104.            T shirt 13

105.            T shirt 14

106.            T shirt 15

107.            T shirt 16

108.            Long sleeve dress shirt 1

109.            Long sleeve dress shirt 2

110.            Long sleeve dress shirt 3

111.            Long sleeve dress shirt 4

112.            Long sleeve dress shirt 5

113.            Short sleeve dress shirt

114.            Shirt other 1

115.            Shirt other 2

116.            Shirt other 3

117.            Dress pants kaki

118.            Dress pants other

119.            Dress pants other

120.            Blue jeans 1

121.            Blue jeans 2

122.            Blue jeans 3

123.            Blue jeans 4

124.            Blue jeans 5

125.            Shorts 1

126.            Shorts 2

127.            Shorts 3

128.            Shorts 4

129.            Belt

130.            Dress belt

131.            Socks / underwear

TOGETHER LIST:

132.            Tiny Glass figurine of a a flamingo and a giraffe

games

133.            Chess

134.            Scrabble

135.            Settlers of Catan

136.            Risk

137.            Stratego

138.            Cranium

139.            Deck of cards

140.            Rook cards

141.            Blockus

142.            Racko

143.            Penta

144.            Boardgame remix kit

145.            Taboo cards

146.            Madgab cards

147.            Dice

148.            Travel scrabble

149.            Things cards

150.            Scatagories

arts

151.            markers

152.            crayons

153.            colored pencils

154.            oils

155.            acrylics

156.            brushes

157.            brush cleaner

158.            sketch book

159.            drop cloth

160.            tape masking, packing, duck, scotch

161.            paint thinner

furniture and room accents

162.            Desk

163.            Desk chair

164.            Bed

165.            Curtains

166.            Sheets – 2 sets

167.            Blankets – 4

168.            Detergent

169.            plant

170.            Framed picture

171.            Poster map of city

172.            Picture of family

173.            Scented candle

174.            Painting of flowers

175.            Painting of gumdrop tree

Transportation

176.            Car

Gadgets

177.            Laptop

178.            Ipod

179.            Camera

Camping

180.            Picnic set

181.            tent

misc.

182.            Medicine box

183.            Letter binder

184.            Ceramic bowls

185.            Space heater

186.            File box/important documents

187.            Calendar

188.            various towels

189.            Bag o chocolate

190.            Bag o candy

191.            Pile o burned cds

192.            A few (6) extra writing utensils

– – – – – – –

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100 Things Challenge

Hi Everybody!

Today I am excited about the 100 things challenge. A story in Time Magazine (2008) introduces the challenge this way:

“Excess consumption is practically an American religion. But as anyone with a filled-to-the-gills closet knows, the things we accumulate can become oppressive…Which is why people are so intrigued by the 100 Thing Challenge, a grass-roots movement in which otherwise seemingly normal folks are pledging to whittle down their possessions to a mere 100 items.”

I’ve been thinking about cutting back on the amount of stuff I own for a long time. This 100 things challenge is just the inspiration I have been looking for! I’m not sure if I can whittle down to 100 or not, but I’m going to give it a shot, and I’ll report back soon about how the challenge is going.

– – – – –

The 100 things challenge reminds me of the story of Saint Antony the Great, also know as Antony of the Desert. Many different lessons can be drawn from the life of St. Antony; but if Antony was anything, he was the poster child for simplicity.

At the age of 34 Antony decided to devote himself to Matthew 19:21, so he got rid of his stuff, moved to the outskirts of town, and became a disciple of a local hermit. Before long he decided that the outskirts of town weren’t cutting it for him, so he actually moved into some tombs which were nearby. He closed the doors of the tomb in on himself and was reliant on others to bring him food each day.

But Antony was not content even with this arrangement. Seeking still greater solitude, he moved into the desert. And when he finally found the ultimate retreat spot in the desert where he could be alone, of course, people came from everywhere to visit him, and he became extremely famous. Go figure.

– – – – –

The lesson here is: if Antony the Great saw simplicity as essential to his life and his faith, and if Antony had to live in the desert to finally find simplicity, then maybe it wouldn’t hurt for me to think about whether I need my box of chocolate truffles.

After all, here I am in an intentional community. We read the Rule of Saint Benedict aloud at mealtimes, for crying out loud! Where are we ever going to find a better setting in which to seriously explore the concept of the simple life?

That said, I have not yet sat down and drawn up a list. But I am excited to give it a shot. I will report back soon on how the challenge is going. If you would like to read more about the challenge in the meantime, you might try here, and here.

Wish me luck!

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Evening Prayer

Our community has a rhythm of praying together each night. It is quite beautiful! We have done tons of different styles of prayer – some that we have never tried before and some that we have grown up with. Here is a list of some of the prayer styles we have tried in the past few months:

• Lectio Divina
• Praying in Colors
  

  We like to light candles during prayer. These candle holders were made by my dad!

• Franciscan Liturgical Prayer
• Common Prayer – A Liturgy for Ordinary Radicals
• Imaginative Prayer
• The Prayer of Examen
• Intercessory Prayer
• Taize Prayer (pronounced tuh-zay)
• Meditative Breath Yoga Prayer

Last night, Kari (who is a certified yoga instructor) led us in a meditative breath yoga session. It is a great way to really relax and reflect on life. After our time of prayer, we shared wonderful reflections. Several people in the community were feeling discouraged. Karen and Dave are in the process of purchasing a home in the neighborhood that will house Formation House in the future. It is a beautiful 6 bedroom, 3 bathroom, 3 kitchen house that is zoned appropriately for community. They were supposed to close on Monday but have had several delays that have been discouraging. Scott is still in the process of finding full time employment and is feeling pretty discouraged about that process plus his car got towed yesterday in an extremely frustrating situation. Kari is feeling a little sick with a cold lately.

In the midst of all this discouragement, prayer last night was uplifting and truly beautiful. Kari reminded us to think about the Old Testament and how they built monuments as a way to remember God’s faithfulness and provision in various places. She invited us to take a moment to remember God’s blessings in the past. This resulted in everyone feeling better and more encouraged.

Reason number 486 whyI love community.

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