The Ant in My Bathroom

“Consider the ways of the ant and be wise.” –Proverbs 6:6

Prior to moving down to Springfield (our apartment is great!) I pretty much got my own bathroom to use. My room was downstairs while everyone else was upstairs, so I was the only one regularly using the downstairs bathroom. Except for my friend The Ant.

Now, understand where the bathroom’s location was in relation to the outdoors. It was the innermost room in the house. It is where the weatherman would tell you to go in case of a tornado. It was separated from the outdoors on one side by a sizable living room and small hallway. On the other side, it was set apart by a bedroom, kitchen, and what became a catch-all area before going out the back door.

So, how did this amazing little creature find his way into the downstairs bathroom? Where were his friends? What in the world did he eat to survive in such a place where everything he could possibly eat would likely kill him? Why was he all alone in the big, damp, scary, lavender and peppermint-scented world of the downstairs bathroom? I have no idea.

The Ant would occasionally greet me in the mornings while I was brushing my teeth. I couldn’t help but think of Flick from A Bug’s Life who was exiled from his colony for screwing up one too many times. Was this the fate of The Ant? Perhaps he was in search of other bug friends to help him gather food for his family.

Or perhaps he was practicing to be like one of the desert fathers, wandering aimlessly in a strange place while communing with and learning from his Creator along the way. This could actually be the case, as evidenced by the tiny crumbs I left on the back of the sink one day, a place that he frequented. I left them there for two days, and they never moved, so either The Ant did not care for the delicious cookie crumbs or he was practicing the spiritual discipline of fasting. I like the think it was the latter.

Regardless of why The Ant made a home in my bathroom, I made a friend that was able to make me smile every time I saw the little guy. It was fun to consider the adventure of The Ant. I hope it made me a bit wiser in the process.

We Are Coming Back!

In light of Jay’s previous post on adventure and a desire to write more on both our parts, we have decided to resurrect the blog a little bit. It’s been about a year since we have been consistent in blogging, and that one year hiatus has energized us for another season of blogging.

We have been thinking a lot about adventure lately as our adventure has a lot of changes right now. I’m sure we will write more about what this looks like in coming posts. As I think about adventure, I realize how so much of life lacks a sense of adventure. We tend to just go through the motions of daily life without cherishing it, without seeing what an adventure life is. That is why we named the blog “Adventures in Togetherness.” We want to be fully aware of what an exciting adventure life is, and we want to let others be encouraged by our adventure. So, we will attempt to paint life in the most adventurous strokes right here. We hope you enjoy following along.

Coming soon is a post about the ant living in my bathroom.

The Habit of Adventure

The Habit of Adventure

Adventure may be found in the most mundane places. A discarded railway token may precipitate an adventure as easily as a gold doubloon. Just ask Jim Hawkins of Black Hill Cove, Lucy playing in the wardrobe, or Fern in the barnyard.

Cervantes said that the road is always better than the inn, but what would Chaucer say to that? One may find adventure as easily in one’s oatmeal as one might on the high seas. Indeed, who knows whether mermaids and other adventurous creatures really prefer brine to porridge? It may simply be that we have not trained ourselves to look for adventures in common places; which is astonishing, since adventures rarely present themselves unlooked for, and almost always begin unremarkably.

For what is adventure, after all? Buried treasure? No. Finding buried treasure? That is closer to the mark. Adventure is the sheer act of looking for treasure. Like a chemical reaction, adventure is what happens when one’s sense of wonder acts upon the world. Wonder, in turn, is what happens when the world acts upon the senses.

It is a mistake to relegate adventure to child’s play, nor is adventure confined within the imagination. Precisely the contrary; adventure is the realm of magic, and heroes, and dragons. That is to say, adventure is very much real life.

Like Picasso said of artists, all children are adventurers. The trouble is how to remain one after one grows up. For when we children grow up, we cease believing in magical creatures, and find that life consisting mainly of something like drudging through rain. We begin to walk with our umbrellas up, heads down, brains full of ever more sophisticated thoughts. We learn to avoid the rain, and in so doing we avoid the rainbow. In short, we grow up and forget that adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered.

Now, there may or may not be a leprechaun at the rainbow’s end. I won’t argue the point. But the rainbow remains, and a rainbow is a thing of magic by itself.

As we grow, we believe that we become self sufficient. We think we come to understand the world. This self deception is mostly harmless. But it is a sad affair to let the wondrous quality of a rainbow be dimmed by an understanding how rainbows work. Is not rather a prism a magic talisman?

Further, is a harrowing, death-defying escapade of the kind seen in films really necessary to constitute an adventure, when our hearts already beat against all odds?

It is true that adventure is a special type of story, a particular genre of film. But adventure is more than that as well. It is a metaphor for life. Adventure is the essence of a life well lived; A life of action, and bravery, and wonder.

And adventures, like life, are episodic. They have a beginning, middle, and end. As we grow old (perhaps the most harrowing adventure of all) and by and by draw near to the end of our tale, what stories we shall have for young and eager ears! Every hero becomes a mentor, and a mentor is twice a hero.

If we fail to detect adventure here, we are like the man who prays for a sign and then shoos away the butterfly. Adventure, like a butterfly, will light upon our shoulders if we let it, and will sometimes punch us in the mouth. But we should not be surprised when this occurs. Instead, we shall draw our sword, our bow, our oatmeal spoon, and fight the dragon back. After all, the only true use of treasure after moth and rust corrupt is to have fought a dragon for it.

 

Modifying the Twelve Marks

Revisiting the Twelve Marks

The book Schools for Conversion: Twelve Marks of a New Monasticism is a collection of essays about new monastic intentional communities. This book had a foundational role in the development of my understanding of intentional communities. (If you are not familiar with the twelve marks, see appendix A at the end of this post.)

The book suffers somewhat from being written and edited by a committee. It reads like a mix between a textbook and a really cumbersome mission statement—the kind of statement you get when constituents try to incorporate every relevant noun and verb into their clauses.

But despite its sprawling scope and fractured style, the book is indispensable for anyone interested in new monasticism because of the ideas, experiences, and passions that the various authors communicate. It is an ambitious book. The authors were seeking to give some form to the new monastic social movement, and I would say they succeeded.  I found the book to be both interesting and inspiring, and I own a debt to the authors for the ideas and vocabulary they supplied.

– – –

Modifying the Twelve Marks

while all new monastic communities are intentional communities, not all intentional communities are new monastic. New monasticism is a fairly specific enterprise (as evidenced by the long list of “marks.”)

Having researched and been immersed in intentional community for a year or so now, I find that I identify with some of the marks more than others. While new monasticism resonates with me, I would not describe myself as a new monastic.

I have taken the liberty of revising the list of twelve marks. I have shortened it down to six. Of the twelve marks put forward by the book, these six resonate with me the most and reflect my take on intentional community.

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, they say. I get the feeling that the authors intended their work to be viewed as a starting point, not as a set-in-stone handbook or a sacred text. As such, I am gratefully using it as a springboard. Here is my shortened list.

– – –

The six most important marks of intentional community in my view:

(I define intentional community as a group of people who are gathered around a common goal, vision, or set of values, and that is characterized by the following marks.)

1. Nurturing common life among members of intentional community. (cf. mark #7)
   – shared rhythms such as meals
   – high degree of teamwork among members
   – egalitarianism
2. geographical proximity. (9)
3. Commitment to positive communication, conflict resolution, and peacemaking. (11)
   – self awareness
   – group decision making processes
4. Environmental consciousness and prioritization of the local economy. (10)
   – gardening
   – sustainability
   – farmers markets
   – product choices
5. Spiritual participation together. (6 & 12)
   – common prayer
   – sabbath
   – celebration
   – hospitality to the stranger
6. Sharing. (2)
   – often some form of common purse
   – sharing resources and/or expenses

– – –

The Marks I didn’t Keep

This exercise has helped me examine my own working definition of intentional community. [keyword: “working.” I am more interested in practice than theory here. I want to examine what we actually do.]

I do not disagree with any of the twelve marks per se. I excluded certain marks simply because they are not central to my particular vision of what intentional community is. For example, the mark relating to single people and married people (8) seems unnecessary. While a very important topic, I ultimately take it for granted that we don’t discriminate on the basis of marital status.

I do not currently share an interest in locating to “abandoned places of empire (1)” and, while hospitality (3) is very important, for me it falls under spiritual disciplines and therefore is not its own mark.

I did not include the marks that pertained specifically to monastic spirituality (such as the “disciplined contemplative life (12),” “way of Christ,” and “rule of life (6),” etc.) or specifically to the church (“racial division within the church (4),” “humble submission to the church (5),” etc.) because I am not a member of a monastic community or a church community, though I do find monasticism and the church to be sources of great inspiration.

I also find new monasticism, as well as Twelve Marks, to be an important source of inspiration as I continue to try to live out my adventure in togetherness.

– – –

Appendix A: Twelve Marks of a New Monasticism, Table of contents

Update on Our Adventure

Update: Half Way

Amber and I have lived in Liberty Community for five months now. In five more months, we will move to Springfield, MO for graduate school.

We love it here in Liberty, and our hearts are sad about the prospect of moving again. We are having such a good time, building so many wonderful friendships, and learning so much about life in community. (To read more about our recent adventures in Liberty, MO, follow the link above. We have been posting there lately instead of here.)

We are excited about graduate school, too. We are presently applying for scholarships and assistantships. (Fingers crossed that the application process goes well!) I will be studying communication and Amber will be studying literacy education.

More about Springfield later. It is one of my and Amber’s goals to live in the present as much as possible. We want to soak up all that is going on around us. And, while we plan for the future, we do not want to be preoccupied by it.

We have a community planning meeting coming up this Sunday. We will be planning a weekend retreat, our spring garden and chicken coop, a possible trip to Texas to work with Points on the Wheel, weekend house-project-work-days, and more!

So, as you can see, there is a lot going on here in Liberty, just the way we like it. Amber and I are excited about all that the fun that await in the weeks and months ahead.

At Peace

As I write this, I am sitting in our new house in Liberty Missouri beside an open window as an almost Fall-like breeze blows through the room. I just heard the church bells down the street chime the hour and the birds are still chirping joyfully. The house is quiet as everyone is at work. Walter, the community beagle pup, is curled up in a chair nearby taking his mid day nap. I wore him out taking a long walk around the beautiful college campus next to the house. I could not feel more at peace in the space I am in right now.

After a whirlwind week of moving, settling in, visiting family, digging and planting a garden, and getting to know people, we are settled into our new home in Liberty, MO. It is good to be here. We have missed being near family so much and we have missed our dear friends greatly. Now, we get both! When we entered Missouri on the 11th hours of our 14 hour drive back last weekend, I felt this great peace flood over me like driving through a waterfall. It feels like I am truly where I belong right now. I felt the same way when we moved to Pittsburgh – like we were meant to be there for a season, and now that we have moved to the next season, it brings me great joy to feel that same sense of God’s perfect peace guiding our footsteps.

Here is a quick update of what we have been up to this past week or two…

We packed almost all of our belongings into our little car in Pittsburgh and drove 14 hours to Liberty, Missouri where our sweet friends Travis and Bethany and Jess and Tyler were waiting to help us unload. We unloaded, unpacked, sorted and came to the conclusion that a garage sale would be happening soon.

Last Monday, we hung out with Tyler and Jess, who we are sharing a house with, and made decisions about what this year would look like as far as sharing life and being intentional with one another. This year is very scaled back from last year for us, but it is ramped up a lot for the Tankersleys, so it was fun to find a happy middle ground. The community here is much more casual and organic than Formation House was. We are enjoying the freedom and flexibility of this so far. We meet with all 8 people (2 other couples are also part of the broader community that we are being intentional with) every Tuesday for a meal, prayer and conversation. Jay and I didn’t know these other two couples very well prior to moving, but are having fun developing relationships with them. We will keep you posted on other community rhythms and updates such as that.

Last weekend we visited the Bowen side of the family in Springfield then went to visit the Howards in Mt. Grove. When we said goodbye, it wasn’t awful because we knew that we were going to be able to see them in just a few weeks instead of half a year or more. I didn’t really think I had a special place in my heart for Missouri, but living elsewhere for a year has shown me otherwise.

Jay started working at Crepes on the Square yesterday. He is training this whole week. I start my job with Liberty Public Schools next Monday, so I am savoring this week of peacefulness and quietness before I dive into a 2-3 grade special education classroom.

We are really happy. For me, living with the Tanks has kind of been a long time dream that I didn’t know would ever happen. It is so joyful to share life with them again. The other 4 people are like a bonus! I feel as though we just keep receiving blessing upon blessing. God is so good to us!

Reflection

Jay and I will be leaving Pittsburgh to make the 14 hour drive home to Missouri at 5am tomorrow morning. I should be packing, but decided blogging was more fun. This week we have had several reflective exercises with the community just to process this year and think about what we got out of it. It has been really helpful and meaningful. On Wednesday, we did an exercise where we just wrote about our experience. I wanted to share what I wrote, as it sums up the year and shows how formative this past year has been. It is by no means a comprehensive essay on the year, but it has some good thoughts in it. Enjoy, and we will see you Missourians very soon!

I entered this year with questions. Am I made for community? Is this the most fulfilling way for me to live life? Will I like the people I live with? Will I tolerate the food we eat?  Will I find meaningful work and friendships outside of the house? Will I get what I am searching for this year, what we dropped everything back home to find?

Joyfully, at the end of this experience, I can answer all of these questions with a hardy yes. I fund community life to be the perfect fit for me. I felt far more fulfilled emotionally and spiritually through sharing my life so closely with seven other people and one golden retriever. The year confirmed that God designed my introverted self to be the most alive through intentional community.

Did I like the people I lived with? Absoulutely. They became family and dear friends far more quickly than I expected. It is so evidents that these eight people were hand selected by a mighty God to experience this intensive year together. The hardest part about leaving this place is leaving these people that I have bonded with over card games, food, prayer and tears. Thankfully, living so intentionally with them has bonded us for life. I look forward to exchanging letters with them and seeing where God leads their adventures. And, I know our paths will cross again, and that fact gives me peace.

It seems ridiculous that I even questioned whether I would like the food we ate this year. I have ate more interesting and delicious food this year than any other season of my life. From Dr. Seuss named foods to brand new vegetables that I have a hard time pronouncing – we have ate exceedingly well. The fellowship that was involved in every aspect of food – preparing it, serving it, eating it, cleaning up, buying it, etc. – brought great life and joy to all of us.

While our AmeriCorps placements were possibly not all we ever dreamed of and more, I did find meaning in that work, and at the same time found great friendships. After a week long training that felt a little like prison combined with a week in the principal’s office, friendships with two of my co-workers emerged that made work more pleasant and leaving more difficult.

I am happy to report that I got what I was longing for out of this experience in Formation House. Coming into this year, I was looking for a framework or a guide for how to live well in community so closely with other people. I wanted to leave this year feeling equipped and ready to start my own adventure into community life. I got all of that and so much more. I am excited to take this experience back to Missouri with me and see what happens.

Leaving Pittsburgh at 5am tomorrow is going to be a bittersweet moment. A moment that makes me thankful for email, facebook, skype and good old fashioned snail mail as we fully plan on creating fun ways to keep in touch with this community as we begin our next adventure.

 

Rewriting Hosea

Recently, I have been contemplating my walk with Jesus and how my journey has changed over the past few years. I decided that there was a turning point a few summers ago when I felt called to take a month “off” from ministry. Prior to that month, I had been very involved in creating a college ministry, leading in a different college ministry, doing youth coaching at my church, doing anything and everything that was asked of me, and just getting burnt out in general. Half way through the month, I took time to just sit with God in a beautiful place in Springfield where wildflowers covered the landscape around me. While I sat there along a path, I read the book of Hosea, because it often brings encouragement to me. As I was reading it, I realized it was writted exactly for me. I immediately took up my pen and journal and rewrote the second chapter to fit the condition of my heart. Here is what I dug up in old journals:

2 I rebuke you, for I am no longer your husband and you are no longer my wife. Remove the busyness from your life and your unfaithful wandering from the path I have set out for you.
3 Otherwise, I will strip away all the “things” and tasks on your to do list. I will make you as bare as the day you first met me – obligation free and immature spiritually. I will turn your heart into a desert and your soul into a parched land. Maybe then you will thirst for me and my will instead of you and yours.
4. I will not bless the “ministry” you are doing because I never asked you to serve in them. I desire great things, not good things.
5 You have been unfaithful and started these things in disgrace, apart from me. You have busied yourself by running after these things for fulfillment. You thought they would provide what you needed.
6 Because of this, I will block your path with thorn bushes; I will put a wall around you so that you have to seek me before you will reach the wildflowers of my love
7 You will try to remain busy, but busyness will not come. You will look for things to do, but come up with nothing every time.
Then you will finally say, “I will go back to my husband, the pursuer of my heart, for I am better off with Him than I am on my own.”
8 You never acknowledged that I was the one that gave you every second of breath, every minute of life. Then you took my gift to you and used it for your own purposes. You took the gift I gave to be used for me and unwisely sought your own desires with it.
9 Therefore, I will take all of your time. I will re-stake my claims on the precious gift I entrusted to you. We will re-start from scratch.
10 So now I will expose your ritualistic life that you have created where you go about doing things for the sake of doing them to all of those whom you lead. No one will be able to pluck you out of my hand this time.
11 I will stop your daily planned out schedule filled with good things and not much greatness.
12 I will remove affirmation from those whom you serve, which you say is your pay from your lovers – those who have stolen you away from me. I will allow others to receive affirmation in your presence and for you to be overlooked.
13 I will punish you for the days you chased after doing; for the days you lost focus of the One who all the doing is for. You “did” all these things, but you forgot me.
14 Therefore, I am going to allure you. I will join you in that desert place where your heart is and speak tenderly to you there.
15 There, I will give you back your schedule after you understand the freedom that I give you to life. I will make the dark valley of your heart into a high mountain that shines my love to the world. There you will sing as in the days of your youth when you had no care in the world, you simply loved me.
16 In that day, you will let me pursue you again. You will call me husband instead of slave-driving master.
17 I will remove your busyness and give you the ability to turn an opportunity down when it is not from me. I will give you greatness instead of goodness.
18 I am making a covenant with you today – I will not allow these beasts to prey upon your heart any more. You will serve me in safety, knowing that I have made your heart a beautiful dwelling that is protected from evil men who wish to use you. Rest, my love, for I have your heart.
19 I will betroth you to me forever. I will betroth you in righteousness and justice, in love and compassion.
20 I will betroth you in faithfulness and you will acknowledge me as Lord and Lover of your soul.

This was written in July of 2008. My heart is longing to be allured into the desert once again. I think for different reasons this time, as I have not got crazy-involved and spread thin as I did back at the time of this writing. I think I am just longing to be embraced by the original Lover of my Soul. Perhaps another rest period is in store for my life. Perhaps just more of an awareness of God’s presence with me as I walk. I don’t know what it is, but I feel like something is stirring, and I am excited about it.

What is God stirring in you right now?

“A Place for Sabbath Feast”

Living the Sabbath: Discovering the Rhythms of Rest and Delight (Norman Wirzba, 2006) is the most down-to-earth book on sabbath I have found so far. It is part of the Christian Practice of Everyday Life series.

The book has two parts. The first, called Setting a Sabbath Context, contains such chapters as The Practice of Delight and The Decline of Delight. The second part is called The Sabbath in Practical Context and contains such chapters as Work and the Sabbath, Sabbath at Home, and Sabbath Environmentalism.

Below I have included a quote from the chapter Sabbath at Home. In it, the author builds a compelling case for community “focal practices,” which among other things is a great bit of terminology. Less confusing-sounding than charism, less committal that mission, less clunky than core value. The paragraph captures my own feelings on Sabbath perfectly.

A Place for Sabbath Feast:

“For Sabbath people, it will not be enough simply to resist cultural forms and expectations. We also need to develop positive practices that will draw us closer to each other. Albert Borgmann has wisely suggested that homes and communities recover what he calls “focal practices;” the set of personal and communal habits that bring people into regular and sympathetic face-to-face contact. In our time of hyperreality, when relationships are increasingly mediated by technological gadgets and automobiles, and when speed overwhelms our capacity for attention and patience,  a focal practice compels us to take stock of how we live from and through each other. These are practices like neighborhood Little League and a community orchestra, activities that bring us into closer contact with each other so that we can directly see how we need and benefit each other and thus really ought to make more time to celebrate and enjoy what we live together.”

Fresh Food!

Last night we had one of the best meals of the year so far. What made it so good? All of the ingredients for it were foraged from within walking distance to our house. Only 3 items were purchased at a store, and even those three were from the Co-Op, so were still local and organic. I got so much joy from gathering and preparing this delicious meal of salad and smoothies. Here is what it consisted of:

• romaine lettuce from our garden
• purselane from our garden and a garden a few block away (purselane is a “weed” that is native to India and has recently started growing in PA. It’s leaves are succulent and full of more antioxidants than any other leafy green!)
• spinach from a local farm that I purchased at the Co-Op
• day lily petals from local day lilies that I picked on a bike ride (yes, day lilies are 100% edible and quite delicious)
• nasturtium flowers from our garden (this is an edible flower that has peppery leaves and flowers)
• roasted chicken that I got from a local farm that sells their chickens at the Co-Op
• radish flowers (these taste a bit like cucumbers)
• cornflowers aka bachelor buttons (edible wildflowers)
• locally made cheese from the Co-Op
• raspberries that Kari and I picked at a local garden
• frozen blueberries from here in PA
• basil, cilantro and other herbs that came from our garden and one nearby
• homemade dressings
• yogurt from a nearby farm

So, this meal not only tasted delicious, it also had little impact on the earth. It brings me great joy to eat good food that cares for both my body and for Creation. I have perhaps been getting a bit spoiled by the ease of eating locally grown organic foods here in PA. What have you been eating lately?

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